1. Taking time to catch some R&R.

    Taking time to catch some R&R.

  2. Things That Annoy Me

    A little about myself, I’m a knower.  I know things.  I have always had an ability, a gift of insight, to read into people’s character.  It is more than just a matter of analyzing body language, mannerisms, speech, behaviors, etc…it is an intuition about whether or not a person is positive, negative, secure, adrift, genuine, fake; a tiny glimpse into their hearts and minds.

    That being said, this is sometimes quite annoying.  It can be difficult to get close to people, difficult to enjoy things at face value, and difficult to give advice.  The best example of this is when it comes to giving advice to my friends about things like relationships. 

    I can spot the bad eggs, even the ones who have groomed themselves so well over the years that they would in the beginning seem sincere.  I can also tell when my friends have become so infatuated with people like this that they cannot, and for that matter will not, see the impending danger.  It’s annoying to be able to read the writing on the wall, and know that what lies ahead is nothing but future hurt and yet being unable to convince someone otherwise.

    More than once has this situation occurred. Boy likes girl, Girl likes Boy, Boy likes Boy, Girl Likes Girl (whatever your cup of tea), only to be later passed up for the next shiny new toy by the other half.  This annoys me.  To know that this will happen while your friend or what have you is so happy, and to have your warnings fall on deaf ears.

    People are not expendable and exploitable that should be treated like rag dolls.  Those people that play others for sport are not in fact true people, they are the societal miscreants that give humanity a terrible name.  And yet they thrive because of the people that feed into their little scams, willingly…believing in some falsified belief that they are different…that they can “change” the player.

    This rant has gotten too long and gone into a tangent.  The point is that it sucks to be aware of all of this happening, and yet feeling helpless through it all.

  3. This kid has some wit, I must admit.

    This kid has some wit, I must admit.

  4. A Word on Advice

    It’s common knowledge that no matter how good of an advice giver someone might be, they can never seem to follow their own advice; especially on matters as sensitive as love and relationships. And why? The answer is simple really: emotional investment.

    See to give someone advice as a third party, as someone on the outside looking in, requires a great deal of cognitive action. We must assess the situation, analyze the factors involved, search out patterns and make logistical predictions, and ultimately draw a conclusion. All of this happens with nothing more than sheer brain power. And because we generally have nothing to gain or lose in the situation, we can nonchalantly offer up third party advise like it was a Black Friday shopping deal.

    Now turn that finger around and imagine your own situations. As much as you may try to justify that “well this is different because…[insert lame excuse here],” the fact of the matter is that it is not different. And if you followed your own advice, your situation would be remedied in a heartbeat. But is our emotional investment in our situations, our realization that we actually stand to gain or lose something that causes us to feel a certain way, that so often hinders us from being able to take the course of action we know is right, even though it feels wrong.

    That’s why no matter how hard we try to stick to our guns, emotions tend to override our thinking. Because the premise of love and relationships is not about thought, it is about feeling. To think about something is to put finite limitations on it, to feel it is to experience it as wholesomely as possible. So don’t think yourself a hypocrite if you cannot follow your own advice, it shows your humanity. Instead of brooding about how and why you can’t follow your own advice, take refuge in the words of wisdom of others.

  5. Pretending that we’re models on one of our North Shore adventures. Haha.

  6. Let’s go to the beach, beach!

  7. Our Song

  8. Homeless Love

    Ever been in a long-term relationship?  Chances are that if you have you have found yourself in one of two roles; you are either a) the person that wonders what life would be like with someone else, the person who has a curiosity to satisfy but is too afraid that they may lose what they already have, or b) the person who begins to see the ever growing signs of the distance with the other despite having still possessing very genuine feelings.

    This feeling that I shall dub “doubt,” is like a homeless guy nagging for a dollar.  And when you give that dollar, that man buys some booze and gets a temporary fix until it finds itself wanting more and begging for another dollar.  This cycle continues on and on until the either a) learns to appreciate and value that which he had before, or b) learns to appreciate and value the new humanity he is is extended.

    Now this is not a commentary on homelessness, and it is in no way a generalized statement about homelessness.  But we must admit that like most things there is an ugly side that exists, a dark side from which we need saving.

    This is just a brief snippet, and it may not make sense to all, but as my own heart seeks to find truth to a question for which there is no satisfactory answer, I thought I would share my thoughts with anyone willing to listen.

  9. ENOUGH!

    Enough is enough.  Who is this person that I have become? This soft, weak, spineless being.  I was always known for my ironclad will, my impeccable ability to move myself beyond incidents of seemingly unbearable motion.

    I AM stronger than this, than all of this.  And I WILL find my strength again.  Aunty Maggie, if you can see me now, give me some of that unshakable resolve for which you were well known.  Instead of brooding over the obvious and the inevitable, why not elate in what I know to be true?

    Today marks the end of all this madness! Except for YOU, yes YOU, if you don’t wish to be trampled over; stay the fuck out of my way!

  10. The 80:20 Rule

    A link to an article that I found about the 80:20 rule and how it applies to relationships.  It doesn’t necessarily have to apply to cheaters, just an explanation for those incidents when sometimes the “right” person is left for the new person.


    Read it, it’s pretty interesting.

    http://travismagazine.wordpress.com/2009/02/10/why-we-cheat-the-8020-rule/

About me

Brenden Lopaka James "Jun-Yi" Burk

The best way to get to know someone, is to ask them questions. *hint hint* ;]

I consider myself a walking paradox. The guy who despite having a serious sense of direction, isn't afraid to wander off the beaten path and take a risk getting lost.

I'm a lover not a fighter (but don't test me), born and raised on Maui, now living on Oahu getting ready to start my last semester at UH - Manoa.

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